In 19 year my thoughtlessly love have dead.

19 year ago I went to Mérida’s Diex to request my first Identification Carnet; I was 10 years old, and I was proud to be enough old to have my documentation. I arrived early, with emotion and uncertainty because although I had all necessary documentation in this country people never know and you always depend of worker mood.

Anyway, I was happy. I did my first sign, my first official picture, and my first fingerprint. In that moment I already knew this country was very corrupted, unsafe, violent, etc. But I had learned love it anyway, loved it thoughtlessly.

I grew loving this country, but knowing is a bad place.

Yesterday, almost 19 years after, I was to request my married passport, in the same country, but more corrupted, unsafe (a lot of more), violent, etc… plus now without democracy and freedom.

Today, I’m adult and reflective person, and is hard keep my country’s love with though… is sad but is my heart reality.

19 year ago, I was request my first official documentation because I was proud to be Venezuelan, yesterday I was request my new passport to go out and start a new live in another country, and become to another nationality.

Is sad cannot feel a little nostalgic when I think about leave this place, but now I don’t find any reason to want be here.

19 years have been more than enough time to want to go as far as is possible. I have been stolen more than 20 times, my right are violent each moment, wherever you are is an unsafe place, etc….

In 19 year my thoughtlessly love have dead.