Wednesday 16 March 2011

First tears in this farewell process


Some years ago, I wrote you some lines about my grateful toward you and my big love to you. Always I remember you like a near, receptive and strong person. The most shameful and painful scold that I have received have been by you. But not because other people didn’t be strong with me, only because you are strongest, lovely and coherent people than I have known, and for me have been very important your opinion about me.
I can remember my different kinds of see you during this time and is easy for me understand as the past I can’t see you, and only could see a beautiful idealization (with its natural fear), but you had patience with me, and show me a lot of time how you are, and I discovered you are a person; I think a really special person! But a person!
I have received your teaching, love, help, patience, accompaniment, scold, care, etc. I have no idea what I do to deserve it, or if I’m able to do something like this for you; but every day, in my heart I say thank (God, big energy life, whatever) for you in my life!
Thank you for accompany me this time, and in the deepest place in my heart I wish will be close up with you wherever I’ll be. I wish too can offer you something as special as you have been in my life.
Some years ago, I wrote you about my feel toward you, and I was sure in that moment, was not a farewell; now I would like it isn’t either.
I want to say you: each time I have though go to other country, the biggest pain I have felt is about don’t see you again, now is not different. My biggest fear is not see you again, my biggest pain is cannot study in ASOVEP, and the thing I’m really sure I’ll miss is the smell of my analyst house.
Anyway, I’ll do each thing I can for see you again (in short time) and feel you near to me. If I cannot, I always carrying with me all things you have given me. But still, I’ll try.
None more words.
I love you.

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